Heading into this new year, I feel stronger, more confident, and have a determination that I can seize upon and also create opportunities for myself. It is probably the most optimistic I’ve felt in recent memory. Looking back upon 2013, the year started out with much grief but soon developed into something quite special with new friends and great experiences. Sharing those experiences while also supporting each other to put our best foot forward as we move past our pasts has allowed us to really enjoy the time we spend together, as well as appreciate the bonds that have been developed.
I’ve decided to move out of Irvine at month’s end, and I’m not sure if I’m crazy for moving away from what I’ve been able to be a part of. But at the same time, I’m confident that my strength and attitude will guide me towards finding a good fit for my career, and towards a special partner with whom I can share my life with. I’m looking forward to more personal growth this year, but also the success I know I can achieve.
Stepping out of the mental shell I’ve been hunched over or sometimes crouching in, I’ve been slowly learning to temper my own expectations of obligations or guilt associated with not meeting the outcomes/scenarios I imagine and the eventual time-lapse anxiety that follows. Heading into this new year, I kept thinking, “I’m not fucking around,” and that’s pretty much true.
Living my life the best way I know how, accepting myself for my faults, surrounding myself with great people, and working on a system to keep getting better or stronger, I feel like I’ve been slowly figuring out the formula to life for me. Some shitstorm might come out of nowhere to tear me up and bring me to my knees, but I’ve already been to hell and back. Good times and bad times will happen, but it’s how you move forward and make the most of the present. I’m reminding myself that it’s time to make a better now, build towards a great future, and succeed.
[I'm going to write nearly every day as part of my system, but I'm not sure just how much will be made public.]